The Battle of the Sexes

People are such interesting creatures. As modern and sophisticated as one likes to assume they are in the 21st century, it all boils down to the vast innate differences between men and women. Although I fully embrace my female gender as miraculous, capable, intelligent and strong creatures, I am not a feminist (I wear too much makeup and fix my hair for that title). However, since I've been out of the work force for almost 9 years, and my companions consist mostly of other moms and little boys, I have witnessed a quirky disposition to my female foe.

It all began when my husband started taking guy trips several years ago with a group of friends he went to college with. (He is currently on a ski trip in Colorado with 8 other men.) The odd reaction I get when I tell my female friends where he is ranges anywhere from anger, resentment, accusatory to "how-are-you-going-to-get-even-with-him" type of attitude. The weird thing is, it has taken me about 10 years to figure this out. I want to thank Chris Rock for opening my eyes.

One night, when I couldn't sleep, I came across a late night cable comedy show by Chris Rock. Trying to put aside his vulgarity, I found myself drawn into his routine about the differences between men and women. It goes something like this (without the f-word):

Chris Rock: "Why is it, men, when your lady wants to go out with her friends, you are so happy for her? She comes home and says, 'Baby, we had the best time! We got our nails down and then went shopping and I got this adorable purse. Then we saw that new movie with Brad Pitt and we all cried...blah, blah, blah' and you are genuinely HAPPY for her! BUT if you go out with YOUR friends, don't you DARE come home and say you had a good time! NO, NO, NO! If she thinks you had ANY fun without HER, you can just kiss sex GOODBYE fellas! If she asks...LIE! Don't you EVER come home and say...'Oh, it was great! It was the best game I think I've ever been too...we had the best seats...it was the bottom of the 9th, all the bases were loaded and A-Rod hits it out of the park...'. No, fellas, you can't do that! You get up the next morning, thinking everything is cool; you ask your woman for breakfast and she says, 'Why don't you ask A-Rod to make your breakfast!' "

Now, of course, Chris Rock is a comedian and he gets paid an extremely large amount of money to make jokes...but it got me thinking...what he said was TRUE. Women DO have a problem with their man going out without them and having a good time. Even worse: a trip! I mean the NERVE! I have friends that have actually said to me, "Well, MY husband would never go on a trip without me." or "Well, when is YOUR girl trip?" or "When is he going to take YOU to the mountains?" It's actually quite comical because most of these women consider themselves to be feminists. Hmmmm...what does the word equality mean, ladies?

Here's the honest truth: I'm not the jealous type and I fully trust my husband. Plus, I'm not afraid of him having fun without me. I've gone on plenty of girl trips and girl dates without him, and you know what? He WAS happy for me. My whole hang-up all these years has been my own gender trying to make me feel like I should be angry, jealous or hurt. Mostly, I was just more concerned about being able to handle the kids on my own for 5 days, not that he might have a good time without me. So, here's to you, honey! If you are reading this, I hope you have a wonderful time! If anyone is deserving of a little fun and relaxation, it's you. HAVE FUN! And I promise, I won't make you suffer for it....I'll even make you breakfast! :)