Whew, it's over!

The difficult part about Christmas is that the preparation is so exhausting! The decorating, shopping, mailing, preparing, baking, organizing, cooking, eating, cleaning...it's overwhelming! Even though I might be five pounds heavier, and our pocket book five pounds lighter, it's definitely worth it!

The highlights of the Christmas 2007 season were: Alex learning so many Christmas songs on the piano. He filled our home with the sounds of the holiday and the joy music can bring. The many charities we participated in with our time or gifts. The decorating of the Gingerbread Houses, which was messy, but cute! The Holiday parties! The baking of cookies that we handed out to our neighbors. The adorable family-picture Holiday Cards. I love getting mail this time of year and proudly display all of the cards! The searching for the perfect gifts (I did a lot of shopping this year on the Internet). The Holiday programs, either at school or church. Visiting with relatives or friends that you only see once or twice a year (and sometimes realizing that once is enough)! :) The magic of Santa Claus! The overwhelming feeling of gratefulness to my Lord. The spirit of goodwill that fills the air.

As enjoyable as it all was, I'm glad it's over. I'm glad I can get back to my regular schedule. I'm glad I can finally find more time to go to the gym. I'm glad I can start writing in my blog again! Now, the reality of normal, daily activities are ahead, and surprisingly, I find that comforting.

Happy New Year and blessings to all! 2008...here we come!

The Reason for the Season

The holidays are here and it's such a busy time. I have a so many projects and to-do-lists that I feel my head is spinning. In my quiet time, when I'm writing this, I stop and reflect upon life's craziness. The good and the bad of it all seems to intertwine together. There is so much beauty, and yet, so much pain as well.
Christmas brings out the "giving attitude" in us all, and also the realization of how many others in the world that need to be given too. I am overwhelmed this time of year with charity after charity needing donations; each one with its own story and crisis; each one touching and pulling at my heartstrings. However, as much as I would love to, I can't give to each one. My heart feels burdened for all the lost and suffering souls that are on this earth. Just this morning, while I was eating my bowl of Frosted Flakes, I opened an envelope that said "EMERGENCY!". It was from World Vision, a Christian Organization that is dedicated primarily to children in Third World Countries. We sponsor a little girl in Indonesia named Butet who has lost her parents to AIDS. Anyway, this particular emergency is about the cyclone that just hit Bangladesh and the thousands of people left homeless and without anything. As I was reading about the devastation, I felt guilty sitting at my kitchen table, in my warm p.j.'s, in my warm home, filling my belly with food. When I feel myself feeling overwhelmed by life's issues, I can only turn to God. I can only lay my burdens (and the rest of the world's atrocities) at Jesus' feet. If I don't, I get depressed.
How does one teach children, who grow up in an affluent neighborhood and school, about the realization of another world? Already materialism is shoved down their throats at such an early age. My son, who's in the first grade, has already made a comment about his 7-year old friend who has a flat screen t.v. in his bedroom. I told him not to worry because he was never going to have a t.v. in his bedroom...flat, round or triangular! He didn't think it was as funny as I did.
We talk to our boys, especially at the dinner table, about other children around the world that don't have any food tonight to fill their bellies, or parents to tuck them in to sleep, or warm clothes or shoes to protect their bodies. It is starting to sink in. My five year-old always includes in his prayers..."Please give the people that don't have food something to eat." It makes a mother proud to know that they are listening to something I am saying.
My prayer for all of us living such blessed lives is to remember to be thankful this holiday season. Remember the true meaning of Christmas. Remember, as my husband always says, "It could be worse." And, of course, remember to tell those people in your lives how grateful you are to have them share this journey with you. Happy Holidays!

Relationships

Relationships are the fiber that threads us together. We all want them. We all need them. Why, then, are they so complex? In reading the book 1st John, it's all about relationships and loving each other. God knew how vital relationships were going to be to human beings (and to Himself) but He also knew how each one was going to mold us into the person we are today. People have so much affect on each other, both positive and negative. Without even realizing it, every gesture, statement, smile or frown can make an impact on those around you.

Raising children allows you to recall your own childhood memories. For instance, when I feel my child is being bullied, it turns me into a fanatic over-protective mom. I HATE bullies! Sometimes as a child I was the target of bullying, but more often, I watched in horror many children being bullied. I felt helpless to do anything about theirs or my terrible predicament. It left a tremendous impact on me. Since I was a tiny girly-girl and an only child, I didn't know how to fight. I didn't want to. The result of that experience (along with others) left a rage growing inside me. To fight to the death for justice! In my 20's I thought I was bad-ass...all 100 pounds of me! Rod used to call me a "Chihuahua" because my bark was definitely louder than my bite. I felt the rage cool in my 30's, but sometimes it sneaks up on me every now and then. PMS, for instance, doesn't always bring out the best in me, especially when children are whiny, argumentative, uncooperative and fighting each other.

Girlfriends are an essential part of my human need for relationships. Since I don't have a sister, and always wanted one, I have searched for surrogate sisters along life's journey. I am so grateful that I have found some along the way. Each "sister" has had a unique affect on me as a person, sometimes good and sometimes bad, but each relationship has left an impression on my spirit. I am so thankful to God that he brought each one of these women into my life to help me grow as a person.

What I have recently discovered is that if my relationship with God is good, then my human relationships are good as well. If I can see people through God's eyes and not mine, then I can truly love that person. I forget about their shortcomings, but focus on their positive traits. I can laugh at my child's trantrum; I can love my husband even when he leaves his clothes on the floor; I don't get offended when a friend calls only when she needs something; I can smile at the stranger I pass on the street; I can love the unloveable.

I'm thankful for relationships. God is good!

Andrew's cool trick!

Yes, folks, what you are about to witness is real! This video has not been altered in any way! My 5 year old has discovered the fascinating world of Science. We are thrilled he is so talented...

Super Heroes Unite!

What a concept: Once a year, we all get to dress up as other people and go to strangers' houses and ask for candy. Halloween reveales our alter-egoes...the Super Heroes inside us all! With mom's birthday being on Halloween, it's even more reason to celebrate! Our neighbor friends joined us for chili, bobbing for apples, cake and trick-or-treating in the neighborhood.

Does life get any better?

Judgment Day

Sadly, the top news stories this morning was about Westboro Baptist Church in Kansas which was ordered to pay $10.9 million to a deceased soldier's father who recently sued the members for ruining his son's funeral. Apparently, the protesters were going to military funerals and displaying hateful and erroneous signs all in the name of God. Reading the posters with the words: "God Hates Fags" and "Thank God for Dead Soldiers" made my heart hurt and my blood boil. What really got me was a boy around 10 held another slanderous sign, not up above his head, but down at his feet, his eyes looking at the ground and his head held in shame. What future lies ahead for this boy? A life filled with anger, hatred, lies and confusion?

I found myself praying for these misguided and terribly confused people, but my heart ached for the boy. My prayer is that someday someone is going to come into his life and minister to him the real message of God. If God "hates" anything it's sin, not the sinner, but the sin itself. Why this particular group decided to fixate on soldiers and homosexuals is beyond me, but everything they are "protesting" is poison and certainly not biblical.

The bible does speak against homosexuality and says it is sinful; however, so is judging others, pride, gossip, over-indulgence, lying, stealing, blaspheme, bitterness, unforgiveness, hatred, foolishness, etc... God does not rank sin like we do, but considers ALL sin equal. Therefore, none of us can escape it. I must confess, and I'm not boasting, I can sin hourly without even trying. Truth be told, we ALL can! God in his unyielding and overwhelming love for us, saved us from ourselves and sent His son to carry that burden for us! All He asks in return is to love Him; to honor Him; to try to follow Jesus' example; to spread the message about His love.

I want to scream to the protesters until I'm blue in the face that God loves them. Yes, them; He even loves them. He "hates" the venom and evilness they are spewing, but He loves them. I mourn for the lost souls who don't experience the love of our Heavenly Father, for it's a love so pure, so undeniable, so strong. And it's because of that love from God that I am able to say, "Father, please forgive them; for they know not what they do."

Withdrawl from the Fires!!!

There is a website I go to often called "Laugh at the Liberals" that posted this commentary on how the Democrats view America and the fire situation in Southern California. I think the most frustrating thing about Democrats is that they are so un-American! Everything is Bush's fault, from Global Warming to the Katrina Disaster to the Immigration Problem to the War. The point this caller makes is so appropriate and fitting of how illogical their thinking is.

Sen. Barbara Boxer was all over the media yesterday talking about how the war in Iraq was causing the California fire to burn out of control due to the lack of equipment and manpower available because of National Guard troop deployment. Of course the commander of the National Guard in Calinfornia said they had all the equipment they needed and have received everything they asked for. (I guess he’s a liar just like Petraeus?)

Sen. Harry Reid said global warming was one of the causes of the California fires and of course we all know thats Bush’s fault.

Have these people no shame? Can honest Americans look at this obvious politicization of a horrible disaster and not be disgusted?

A caller to Rush Limbaugh’s program said it best when he asked, Why are’nt the Democrats calling for withdrawl from the fire, just like Iraq? The situation seems similar. A raging fire being pushed by an unstoppable wind. There’s no way we can defeat the fire. Fires have been burning for thousands of years. All we are doing is occupying the fire’s native land. The fire was their first. We’re only there because real estate (oil). All we want to do is control this valuable commodity. GET OUT! Get out now. Our firefighters (troops) are being needlessly sacrificed in a battle they can’t possible win…I mean they’re the best firefighters in the world, don’t get me wrong, I support them 100%, but they are needlessly putting out small, innocent civilian fires, hundreds of them…and in some cases using water to torture the fires until they reveal where other fires are burning….ALL OF THIS APPROVED BY BUSH!….

While thousands of Marines stand-by in Camp Pendleton, waiting for orders to go out and fight the fire, Barbara Boxer (D), wants to bring troops out of Iraq to fight the fire.
Brilliant Barbara, Brilliant!

Global Warming....the new "Religion"

A dear friend of mine watched an episode of "20/20" the other night about Global Warming. There's another story that the extremists don't want to believe or even be debated. Here's a sample of what 20/20 discovered about Global Warming:

The globe is warming, but is it really all our fault? And is it true the debate is over? No. What you think you know may not be so.

In the movie, for example, Gore says that if we allow the globe to warm, "sea levels worldwide would go up 20 feet." Then he shows his audience terrifying maps of Florida and San Francisco submerged under rising sea levels. But the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change, which shared last week's Nobel Prize with Gore, said that would probably take thousands of years to happen. Over the next 100 years, sea levels are expected to rise seven to 24 inches, not 20 feet.
Gore also implies that polar bears are dying off, because receding Arctic ice has forced them to swim longer distances. The kids I interviewed were especially worried about the fate of the polar bears. But the polar bears appear to be doing all right. Future warming may hurt them, but right now data from the World Conservation Union and the U.S. Geological Survey show most populations of polar bears are stable or increasing.

The most impressive demonstration in Gore's movie is that big graph of temperature and carbon dioxide levels stretching back 650,000 years. Carbon dioxide is thought to amplify temperature increases, but his graph seemed to show clear cause and effect: When carbon dioxide levels rose, so did temperature. It suggested that carbon levels controlled temperature. But a real inconvenient truth is that the carbon increase came after temperatures rose, usually hundreds of years later. Temperature went up first.

I wanted to ask Gore about that and other things, but he wouldn't agree to an interview. According to Gore, the "debate is over."

I interviewed some scientists who say the debate is by no means over. John Christy and Roy Spencer won NASA's Medal for Exceptional Achievement for figuring out how to get temperature data from satellites.

"We all agree that it's warmed," Spencer said. "The big question is, and the thing we dispute is, is it because of mankind?"

Climate changes, they say, always has, with or without man. Early last century, even without today's huge output of carbon dioxide, the Arctic went through a warming period.
Greenland's temperatures rose 50 percent faster in the 1920s and reached higher average temperatures in the 1930s and 1940s than today's temperatures.
Some scientists argue the warming might be caused by changes in the sun, or ocean currents, or changes in cloud cover, or other things we don't yet understand. The debate is not over.

But who's to say that yesterday's temperature is the perfect one?

"The fact is, when climate changes, there are gains and there are losses," said Tim Ball, who studies the history of climate change. But, he points out, all we generally hear about is the bad news from the IPCC — that massive group of climate scientists.
Paul Reiter of the Pasteur Institute participated in one of the IPCC drafts and Christy was a contributing author. Both say that this Nobel Prize-winning group is not what people think it is.

"The IPCC is the Inter-governmental Panel on Climate Change," Reiter said. "It is governments who nominate people. You'll find in many chapters that there are people who are not scientists at all." Reiter claims that some of these scientists are "essentially activists" and there are some members with affiliations to groups like Greenpeace.

When the IPCC report came out, not all its members agreed with what was said. "We were not asked to look at a particular statement and sign our names, at all," Christy said.

Reiter felt his objections were ignored and says he resigned in frustration. But in a draft of the report, the IPCC still listed Reiter as a "contributing author" — part of the so-called consensus.
"I contacted the IPCC and I said, 'Look, I've resigned. I don't want to have anything more to do with this.' And they said, 'Well, you've been involved, so you're still on the list.'" Reiter says he had to threaten to sue to get his name removed from the report, although the IPCC denies that.

In all the confusion surrounding the global warming debate, one thing is clear: Global warming activists don't welcome the skepticism.

Those who call their extreme projections into question are compared with Holocaust deniers and accused of being paid off by big business. I've questioned the extreme global warming predictions in the past, and for that I've been branded a "corporate toadie" and a "flat-earther."

I don't mind being called names, but is this what the global warming debate has come to? One side saying, "Shut up. Dissent should not be heard?"

The truth is, that while everyone agrees that the earth has warmed, lots of good scientists don't agree that it's mostly our fault, and don't agree that it's going to be a catastrophe. So when Gore says, "The debate is over," I say, "Give Me a Break!" John Stossel, 20/20

Before I get any hate mail, I just want to add that I'm very pro-green! I recycle (my 17 year old brother accused me of trying to save the Rain Forrest because he saw how much recycling my family contributes); I ask for paper sacks when I grocery shop and sometimes even bring my own sacks; I conserve energy via energy-efficient light bulbs, ceiling fans, car pooling, etc... I totally get that God gave us this Earth to take care of and wastefulness is sinful...but I'm with John Stossel on this one...give me a break! I'm glad that he had the guts to come out and speak on an issue that is so controversial. It's refreshing to hear the flip-side of the story, and fiestiness is always a good thing in my book.

What's wrong with "Prosperity Preaching"?

When I read or hear about "Prosperity Preaching" I cringe. This particular website called "desiringGod" puts it this way:

"Paul said, 'There is great gain in godliness with contentment, for we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world. But if we have food and clothing, with these we will be content.' But then he warned against the desire to be rich. And by implication, he warned against preachers who stir up the desire to be rich instead of helping people get rid of it. He warned, 'Those who desire to be rich fall into temptation, into a snare, into many senseless and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils. It is through this craving that some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many pangs' (1 Timothy 6:6-10). So my question for prosperity preachers is: Why would you want to develop a ministry that encourages people to pierce themselves with many pangs and plunge themselves into ruin and destruction?"

Amen, brother! I don't watch very many t.v. Evangelists but I do like to watch Joel Olsteen on occasion. It alarmed me to learn that recently he has been offered $13 million for his new book, plus he drives a Ferrari and lives a lavish lifestyle. I brought this topic up today to some of the woman I do a bible study with. I got some mixed opinions, and quite a few responses that disappointed me. They were of the opinion that if he earned that money outside of the church (like in his book sales) that it was okay that he lived a lavish lifestyle, and they argued, that he could have been given the Ferrari by a church member, and he could be giving most of that $$ away anonymously. Basically, who was I to judge (my words, not theirs). They are right about the judgment part, but I keep going back to scripture on this one. God wants our needs to be met; he wants us to blessed but He never said material possessions, that will rot and rust when we leave this Earth, were particularly apart of His blessings. Here's more of what "finding God" says:

'What is it about Christians that makes them the salt of the earth and the light of the world? It is not wealth. The desire for wealth and the pursuit of wealth tastes and looks just like the world. It does not offer the world anything different from what it already believes in. The great tragedy of prosperity-preaching is that a person does not have to be spiritually awakened in order to embrace it; one needs only to be greedy. Getting rich in the name of Jesus is not the salt of the earth or the light of the world. In this, the world simply sees a reflection of itself. And if it works, they will buy it. '

After pointing the finger at preachers and Evangelist for living a lifestyle I don't feel is Godly, I have to take a look at myself. Can I scale back on my spending? The answer is: absolutely! Can I give more? The answer is: absolutely! Can I be homeless like Jesus? No, because I have a family to raise, but I can desire His ways and not the worlds, which are pure, unselfish, and certainly unmaterialistic! My flesh desires material things and the physical and temporary comfort that money can bring, but my spirit desires Jesus. The next time I desire to spend when I should be giving it away, I need to be reminded that if I died tomorrow is God going to care about the car I drove or the house I lived in or is He going to care how many souls I touched; how much I loved Him; how much I tried to be like Jesus?

I don't know what Joel Olsteen's financial situation is; that's between he and God. I do know that scripture says..."What is hidden, will be revealed." However, I personally think that if you are in a "service-oriented" field, such as a police officer, fireman, teacher, doctor, and preacher or rabbi, etc...you are held to a higher standard. I expect police officers to obey the law because they represent the law. I expect teachers to not seduce their students because they are entrusted with children. I expect preachers to live a lifestyle that is conducive to biblical teachings....aren't they telling the world, via the television and radio, about God and the bible? Is it wrong for me to expect more from them, after all, they are only men/women, flesh-and-blood? Perhaps. All I can do is pray that the men and women who are called into ministry stay grounded in the Word and do what is pleasing to the Lord....and I pray that prayer for myself as well.

What Little Boys Are Made Of

"And he grew and grew strong as a boy must grow who does not know that he is learning any lessons, and who has nothing in the world to think of except things to eat." ... Rudyard Kipling, "The Jungle Book"

"There comes a time in every rightly constructed boy's life when he has a raging desire to go somewhere and dig for hidden treasure." Mark Twain

"Oh, the eagerness and freshness of Youth! How the boy enjoys his food, his sleep, his sports, his companions, his truant days! His life is an adventure, he is widening his outlook, he is extending his dominion, he is conquering his kingdom. How cheap are his pleasures, how ready his enthusiasms! In boyhood I have had more delight on a haymow with two companions and a big dog -- delight that came nearer intoxication -- than I have ever had in all the subsequent holidays of my life." John Burroughs

I came across this book of quotes about boys that my mother-in-law gave me, and as I read through it, I remembered this picture of Andrew with a frog on his head. He's my all-boy, get-dirty-dig-in-the-dirt, kind of kid. He loves to eat, sleep, laugh, play, to capture bugs or lizards, to dig in the dirt, to pee outside, to strip-down-butt-naked outside on the front lawn not caring who sees him, to burp, to toot (and announce it just in case you didn't hear)...all these things make him so happy!

I have many funny stories about my boys. One in particular sums up the "testosterone-induced-craziness" I'm dealing with. A saleswoman recently came to the house to show me samples of ceramic tile for our hall bath. As she was leaving, and I'm helping her carry her samples to her van, as if planning her exit, Andrew and Aidan simultaneously decide to give her this farewell: Aidan sweetly waves and yells, "Bye-bye Poopie-head" while Andrew pees on the front lawn with his shorts down around his ankles. Alex just stands at the door laughing. I tried to say something clever to the woman like, "Do you know these kids? Who are they and why are they calling me mom?" Good thing she had a sense of humor.

Since I was a girly-girl, and hid in the closet when my boy cousins would chase me with bugs or light fire-crackers just to freak me out, it has been quite an adventure raising boys....but I wouldn't trade it for anything!

Reunion Survivors

My flash-back in time to 1987 was a wild trip. While 80's music filled the air, familiar faces (and not so familiar ones) took me on a journey to a different era when hair was permed and big, shoulder pads and leggings were hot and Madonna and "The Bangles" were our idols. As I made my way through the crowd, comparing name tags to faces and stopping along the way to hug and chat with an old friend, I realized something: we all grew up! No one had pimples on their faces, braces on their teeth or felt self- conscience that they didn't fit in. We all fit in. The women that I shared childhood with had grown to be beautiful and confident with careers and motherhood under their belts. The guys weren't the boys I remembered but men with pot-bellies, facial hair and (some) bald or grey heads with all of life's experiences written on their faces. I love the grown-ups we had all become!

I wasn't sure what to expect or anticipate, but I left the reunion feeling very thankful that I went. I realized that I had many more good memories than bad. And as I laughed with the friends I shared the 80's with, I realized that we all have a commonality that will forever bind us together....memories. Thanks, class of 1987, for the good times. Go Trojans!

Mercy and Grace

Self-examination is always a hard process. This week's journey has involved a look inward and whether or not my heart and motives for saying and doing the things I do are always pure. Since I am a mere mortal, I can honestly say, no, they are not. I get angry/irritated when I should be patient. My words aren't always kind. My thoughts aren't always "heavenly". My actions aren't always "Christ-like" but "worldly". It's a daily struggle. I am, after all, a product of two very vocal, opinionated and unique individuals...and I live in this world.

What I've realized is that I'm forgiven. I don't have to be perfect. I should strive to have a pure heart, but I'm going to stumble from time-to-time. When realizing my short-comings, I should make every effort to correct them, ask for forgiveness, and then move on. In reading scripture, I'm reminded over and over about God's mercy and grace. I'm in complete awe of Jesus' example of mercy. Even when being crucified on the cross his thoughts were on forgiveness... "Forgive them Father, for they know not what they do." His compassion towards others, even as they were torturing Him, is the ultimate testimony of love.

"The unfailing love of the Lord never ends! By His mercies we have been kept from complete destruction. Great is His faithfulness; His mercies begin afresh each day." (Lamentations 3:22-23)

A Blessed Day

My day from 9:30 - 1:45 was spent hand-addressing invitations at Church for a fundraiser/banquet for "Marriage Today", which is a Christian-based-marriage-enrichment program and TV show. The creator and host has preached at our church and was also one of the speakers at the marriage seminar we attended this summer (which, by the way, was the best thing we have done for our marriage).

Thinking that I was going there to serve God really ended up blessing me. Isn't God always like that? I met the most amazing women who had wonderful and miraculous testimonies to share. I left there with three phone numbers, e-mails, hugs and a wealth of knowledge. Since May, God has led me on a journey that only He could do. He seems to always put the right people in my path, to help guide me, encourage me and validate my beliefs and faith. In a world that's so cynical and lost, my spirit has been so thirsty for the comfort that only Jesus can fill. I'm starting to feel differently, think differently and hopefully, act differently. When I was getting impatient with my children this afternoon, clenching my teeth and about to "go off" on them, I felt this small voice inside me say, "Tyra, I am so patient with you. Can't you be patient with them?" I stopped, unclenched, and thought, "Yes, Lord, I can."

My biggest obstacle seems to be talking with non-believers. What has become so apparent to me, is so foreign to them. They think I've gone mad. Being among these women today made me realize how much I needed their encouragement and their wisdom. Some were older than me and some were younger, but they all seemed to have so much faith and trust in the Lord. God knew where my spirit needed to be.

Thursday is a new journey. I'm doing a study called, "Loved By God" with a different group of women from our church. It's a learning process that I'm so thankful God has been so patient in teaching me. It was a good day.

What God Can Do

Today at church I heard the most amazing testimony by James Robison. It's worth retelling.

James' conception was the result of rape. His father was an alcoholic who raped his 40-year-old single mother. His mother tried to abort him, but the doctor she went to refused so she gave birth and decided to give him to a preacher and his wife. He lived his first 5 years with the preacher (whom he called Daddy) and his wife (Mommy) and visited his mother off and on. Even though the couple wanted to adopt him, his mother refused, and at 5 decided that she was going to take James away from them. James said it was the scariest and saddest moment of his life. He remembers his mommy collapsing and sobbing on the floor and his daddy begging his mother to not take him away. He ran to hide under the bed, but his mother drug him out by his ankles and took him away from the only home he had ever known.

Since his mother didn't have a job, money or a home, they hitchhiked across the country staying with various relatives, friends, or anyone that would open their doors to them. He would sit on the side of the highway on a brown cardboard suitcase that he, to this day, displays in his office. He moved 17 times before he was in the 6th grade, so he never had any friends. His Daddy and Mommy tried to keep in touch with him, sending him letters and gifts, but one day, it all stopped and he didn't know why. He decided that it was because they didn't love him anymore. He grew to trust no one. Later he learned that his mother, because of her jealousy, returned all the gifts to his "adopted" parents and asked them not to send anymore.

It gets worse before it gets better; at 14 his alcoholic father reenters their lives and becomes abusive and one night tries to choke his mother to death. He grabs his rifle, tells his father that if he moves an inch, he will blow a hole into him...and he means it. Shortly after that, his father is sent to prison. At 16 his mother gives him an incredible gift. She says he can go visit the preacher and his wife for a week. Apprehensively, he calls them, not sure if they want to see him, thinking that they have forgotten about him. They both start sobbing on the phone and tell him they will come the next morning to get him. They arrive in an air-conditoned car (which he had never been in) and take him back to the house where he had lived 11 years ago. They shower him with their love and tell him that they never stopped praying for him. In fact, the whole church had been praying for him.

That week, on Sunday night, at his Daddy's church, James listened to the testimonies of the various youth get up and talk about what Jesus meant to them. Sure, James had heard of Jesus, he had tried church and religion before, but these kids were talking about Jesus as if they had a relationship with him. Later his Daddy asked if anyone wanted to ask Jesus into their heart and come to the alter. James wanted to, but he was scared. He looks up and sees his mommy walking down the isle towards him, holding onto her glasses because she is crying so hard, and she grabs James' hand and says, "I'll go with you." For the first time, James felt a love that was indescribable wash over him. He wasn't the bastard child of a rape victim, but a wanted and loved child of God. His life meant something; Jesus was willing to be crucified on a cross and shed his blood so that James could have eternal life. He was free of shame, of anger, of bitterness and unforgiveness because Jesus took that burden on himself; he didn't have to carry it anymore.

By 19, James was a preacher and was traveling and evangelizing with the likes of Billy Graham in football stadiums, coliseums and the largest churches in America. He has led thousands to know Christ. For 20 years he has founded and ran an organization called Life Outreach International that has fed thousands of starving children and since 2000 has drilled more than 1500 wells in villages worldwide.

I had to retell this story because it touched me so much. The power of the holy spirit is so awesome and inspiring! God has used James to fulfil the promise that he has for us all; that we are here for a reason. To love each other; to reach out to the sick, needy, broken souls; to share the good news of Jesus.

Now I have shared it with you.

20 years???

My 20 year high school reunion is fast approaching. I'm amazed it's been that long...can I really be this old? What happened to the girl that could eat anything and never gain a pound? Those days are long gone, but actually, I wouldn't trade places with her. My high school memories leave me feeling sad for that girl I remember. She was unsure of herself; she was searching for love in all the wrong places (isn't that a song?); she wasn't happy. If I could take a time capsule backwards to 1985-1987, I would do it all so differently. Even though painful, I suppose that time in my life were growing pains that needed to be experienced.

So on October 13th I will relive some of those memories, and hopefully, find some good ones along the way. I will see familiar faces that were apart of that experience for me and wonder how many I will recognize. For some reason, I want to vindicate that teenage girl and show them the woman I have become. In actuality, I'm sure that's why a lot of people go to their high school reunions; not to relive the good ole days, but to prove that they survived.

Here's to the survivors! I'll see you soon.

Click and watch! So cute!
http://flagrantdisregard.com/index.php/2007/09/17/parenting-in-d/

A Mother's Love

After reading my cousin's blog on her parents, it inspired me to write something about my mom and motherhood. So mom, this is dedicated to you.

I feel so blessed to be a woman. How amazing it is that God gave us the ability to give life; to feel a child kicking in your womb and knowing that he/she is growing inside you. There is no greater gift, but with that gift comes great responsibility. I sometimes wonder if I am up for the task. I worry that I'm not wise enough, patient enough, playful enough. I spend my days reinventing ways to discipline my children using charts, checks, threats, bribes. I read all the latest child-rearing books, and yet, I still feel inadequate as a mother. One thing I know for sure: I love them. I hope they know how much they are truly loved.

Having my own children made me appreciate my mother so much. It has taken me a long time to realize just how wise my mother is; how strong she is; how unconditional her love is. Except for God's love, I will never experience another love so devoted and pure. My mother gives herself fully to me and is always my biggest champion. She believes I can do anything! She once said that she was put on this earth to be my mother; I gave her a purpose. I feel so blessed that she raised me to love God, and although I haven't always lived my life for Him, she never stopped praying for me. She sacrificed so much as a single mom, worked so hard and always had my best interest at heart. I regret not taking all the advice she gave me because most of the time, she was right. Now, I value her opinion so much and learn from her daily. She is my friend, my rock, my Spiritual mentor, but most of all...she is my mother.

Thank you, mom, for giving me life and for your unconditional love. I hope you know how much you are truly loved.

The Big "7"

Yesterday, we celebrated Alex's 7th birthday! It proved to be a sensational event for us all...and I got some good lessons to boot. Here's how it unfolded:

Alex's day was to begin with a birthday announcement and dance on the O.C. Taylor Morning Show! He was very excited and gave me a sample of his birthday dance while I was preparing his breakfast. I tenderly explained that he might not want to flail his arms about as to not hit the kid next to him...I wonder if he took my advice? Rod and I promised we would meet him for lunch in the cafeteria, and after careful and precise instructions, I brought him some Chick-Fe-Le chicken strips, honey-mustard sauce, fries and a Sprite. Rod was a big hit with the first-grade girls that joined us at our table...he has such a way with the ladies! While the boy sitting next to Alex decided to put his cucumber slices on his eyes, which promptly fell into his tomato soup, the girls sitting across from me told me their life-stories (apparently, a lot has happened in their 6 years of life). Whew, girls can talk! When asking boys about their day, I usually get one-syllable answers such as: "nah", "yeah", "fine", "good". I received a good lesson about little girls that day: they are just as silly (if not more) as boys and they like bathroom humor just as much. It was an eventful lunch!

The rest of my afternoon was spent cleaning, wrapping presents and baking a cake, which Aidan decided to stab with the butter knife when I left to answer the phone. Another good lesson: Icing and sprinkles can disguise any imperfections.

I had made reservations for Alex's favorite Italian Restaurant, and the boys and I met Rod, Mam-maw and Grandma Pat and Pa promptly at 6:00 pm. Lesson number three: Always drink wine when going out to eat with three boys.

Afterwards, we came back to our house for cake, ice cream and opening presents. We invited our neighbors and their children over too. Lesson number four: don't bother mopping the kitchen floors before company arrives; it's a waste of time.

After tucking my older boys into bed last night, I was dog tired, but happy. I kissed my husband and said, "We have a good life." We are blessed.

Happy Birthday, Alex!

Back to Reality

!Hola Amigos y Amigas! We safely arrived yesterday from our vacation rendezvous in Playa Del Carmen...and back to reality! We were so elated to see the boys, my mom, Liza, Maggie and our house...but three temper tantrums later, I woefully said to Rod, "I think our vacation is over!"

Our time spent in Playa was the most disgusting display of laziness one has ever witnessed. We slept late, ate breakfast, laid out on the beach or pool, drank cocktails, took naps, ate lunch, laid out some more, drank some more, ate dinner, took a midnight stroll or gab fest on the beach, played ping pong or pool in the game room, went to bed and started it all over again the next day. We varied our meals, our clothing and bathing suits and we did go to the local markets to barter and to get massages (the best I'd ever had); otherwise, we relished every moment of degeneracy that we could muster. Rod and I discovered we were quite skilled at doing nothing and decided that we could definitely get used to our new lifestyle. Perhaps we held the winning $369 million lottery ticket we purchased before we left for vacation...our return marked the beginning of a new life where we could retire to a secluded tropical paradise...but, alas, it was not meant to be...a man in Houston (and 3 out-of-staters) claimed our prize. Hopefully, they are as skilled as we are at doing nothing.

Besides our slovenness, we laughed...and I mean we laughed a lot. It was as cleansing to my soul as the R&R. Our trip mates were my in-laws, Pat and Van, and our friends and neighbors, Allen and Mette. This unique combination of individuals, including ourselves, made for quite a humor-filled 5 days. It started when we arrived at the airport and Van and Mette were singled out as "Special Security Check". They both look very suspicious; after all, most terrorists are grumpy 68 year-old bald men and fair, petite women from Norway. They didn't fool anyone. I, however, was offered to be accompanied on my trip by one of the stellar security guards who was standing by a sign that read "No jokes, please" while poor Van and Mette were being stripped searched and put into a capsule that shot fast and loud puffs of air all over their bodies. I later learned that this was to detect any chemicals or powders that they could have been using to make a bomb. Their shoes, belts, glasses, wallets, etc...were tested for residue. I now felt extremely confident my companions were not going to hijack our plane. However, I was somewhat suspicious of "Gus" in airport security....he was still smiling at me.

Some other highlights were, of course, Van's amazing "9-lives" that he continues to tempt fate with. He tends to be accident prone, but even with a fall down the resort lobby stairs and a backward somersault out of his beach chair, he only got a sprained ankle. Which we somehow have several pictures of.

Rod decided to liven up our party by daring Allen to do embarrassing, dangerous, or ridiculous acts for a nominal fee. We dubbed Allen "Rod's Dare-Whore". I finally had to put an end to this after I realized Rod was throwing our money away so he could watch Allen jump into a waterfall and pose for pictures like a super model. I mean, enough was enough!

Awww such memories! It was the best of times....:)

You Can't Take It With You....

Soon Rod and I will both be out of the country, so we decided to get our Will updated. Even though one knows that death is an inevitable part of life, it's a strange thought to ponder...especially when you have young children. Thinking about leaving my mom and children behind makes my heart ache; however, I'm not afraid to die. After listening to the recent series on heaven at church, it actually gives me great comfort and anticipation towards my afterlife. It is the people I would leave behind that makes me want to cling to life.

The day after we updated our Will, Leona Helmsley died. The headlines read: "Leona Helmsley leaves $12 million to her dog." Upon reading the rest of the story, you realize that this woman went to her grave with hatred, bitterness and unforgiveness in her heart. How unfortunate that a person chooses this path. The starving children in Africa, the homeless lying on the streets of America, all abused and neglected souls surely could have used some of that $12 million, but instead a dog named "Trouble" will reap the rewards. It made me sad for Leona Helmsley that she lived 87 years on this Earth and obviously never"got" it...that is, the true meaning of life. It also made me look inward and ask myself, "Are YOU getting it?" What am I doing to make the world a better place? When I meet my maker, will I struggle to tell Him about my kindness, my humility, my service or my forgiving heart? I hope not. I don't want to waste this precious life He gave me; and at the end of it, I want to really get it!

To all my 5 readers...bonvoyage...I'll update my blog next week!

Awww..The End of Summer!

The end of summer is fast approaching....next Monday is the first day of school! This event, along with my upcoming trip to Cancun, is making me feel a little jittery inside! I feel like a kid again, anticipating an event that is new and unknown. When I ask Alex if he is excited about school starting, he shrugs and nonchalantly says, "Nah." My stomach, on the other hand, is doing cartwheels. How can he be so calm?

Reflecting on these last three month's of long, hot (and surprisingly rainy) days of summer '07 puts a smile on my face. I got my tummy tuck at the end of May, and although painful, expensive and hard on my mom, was a procedure I am grateful I got to have. June brought record-breaking rainfall for most of Texas, and I was in recovery-mode, so the kids and I did a lot of "bonding" that month. July was back to the gym and swimming time and Aidan learned to hold his breath under water. August proved to be hot and somewhat mundane, but Sea World brought a welcomed break from our day-to-day routine. September is looming around the corner with great anticipation....school, Cancun, Rod's birthday, Alex's birthday, PTA...more of life's experiences to be shared!

Goodbye, summer....

Please don't strike, Hurricane Dean!

Since March, I have been planning a trip to Playa Del Carmen (30 minutes from Cancun, Mexico) for Rod's 40th birthday, but Mother Nature may put a damper on my plans. Yes, Hurricane Dean has hit the Gulf of Mexico. From what I have read, the most damage has been to the Yucatan Peninsula and the major resorts in and around Cancun haven't been too affected by Dean's wrath.

Although this is good news, I am still somewhat anxious. You see, I stay home with 3 boys. It has been a long summer. I am desperately needing some R&R on a tropical, 4-star, all-adult resort where my major dilemma of the day is..."What bathing suit should I wear?" I have been dreaming of lying on the beach, drinking froo-froo cocktails, reading a titillating romance novel and basking in my slothfulness. Not to sound too narcissistic, but doesn't "Dean" realize what he's doing to me? I know, I know, lives have been lost, homes have been damaged, businesses are closed...it's all quite tragic. However, I'm not sure "Dean" has ever stayed at home ALL summer with three hyper-active, bored boys whose greatest past time is to torment their mother. Surely, "Dean" is a man (disguised as a hurricane) who has no idea what a stay-at-home mom goes through...if he did, he would have stayed in the Caribbean.

To my fellow vacationers, Pat, Van, Mette, Allen, and of course, Rod...all I can say is...PRAY! :)

Sea World...or Bust!

My family just got back from a fun-filled and exhausting five days in San Antonio! One of the high points of our trip was visiting Sea World and feeding the dolphins! In the pictures above, my two-year-old is tempting a dolphin with his tidbit of dead fish. Realizing that the dolphin intends to eat the fish, Aidan decides to take it back during the feed...thus, a battle of tug-of-war ensues...but the dolphin wins...hence, the smile!

Sea World was amazing, and I highly recommend the shows. The food, however, was expensive and lacking in any nutritional value whatsoever. I was beginning to feel as big as Shamu since my diet consisted of mainly greasy fried foods with a side order of french fries (whether you wanted them or not). Come to think of it, I think Shamu ate better than we did. Luckily, I packed some oranges and granola bars so that my children wouldn't forget what real food tasted like. The restaurants on the River were exceptional, though, and every meal we ate in the evening was surprisingly good...sans the fries!

As I was unpacking from our trip and reflecting on the events, I think the children had a great time. One night we let the boys order ice cream for room service, which Alex was tickled about...okay, so it was $13 (with tax and tip) for three scoops of ice cream, but it's about the experience, right? Rod and I got two date nights by ourselves since my mom offered to watch the boys in the hotel room, so we had a great time. Hopefully, my mom enjoyed herself too (she said she did)! All-in-all we will have some great memories...

Have you heard of Huckabee?

Recently at church we had a guest speaker who happens to also be running for President. I hadn't heard of him until then, but I must say, he was quite impressive. I actually got goosebumps thinking what it would be like to have a leader with such conviction, values and new ideas. A politician that could be respected...could that actually happen? He wasn't there to talk politics or even promote his campaign (well...maybe just a little...) but to preach. And he was good.

Unfortunately, I don't see Mike Huckabee in America's future, and that makes me sad. My fear is that we are going to have another Clinton...God, help us! Hopefully, I haven't completely turned into my mother (sorry, mom), but if Hillary wins, I might just have to stop watching television. Perhaps I'll become an info-mercial junkie instead of a Fox News viewer. I won't know anything about what's going on in the world except how to make salsa in my new hand-held blender that turns into a vacuum cleaner...or perhaps I'll decide to watch a new reality t.v. show about a 40-something Scott Baio finding his true love (gag).

My reaction to watching Hillary makes me want to turn into my 5 year old, Andrew; put my hands over my ears, close my eyes and scream over and over..."I can't hear you. I'm not listening to you." Not only do I not agree with her politics, but I don't think she is a person of substance, moral-character or value. She just rubs me the wrong way, like a bad itch that won't go away.

Even though I voted for Bush, I don't think he's been the greatest President. I'm a fan of his moral-character and convictions, and truly believe he is a man of God. However, I must admit, that he too has made me cringe watching him blunder his way through media interviews. It's definitely time for a change. Even though I would prefer a Republican in office, I pray God's favor over America's soil...because we certainly need it!

Meaning to a familiar song...

Like most people, Alex loves music, but at 6 prefers grownup tunes rather than"baby" music (as he so respectfully calls it). Recently, Rod purchased a refurbished MP3 Player for he and Alex and uploaded some kid-safe songs for him to rock out to. The hardest part was trying to find some rap music that his still innocent-ears could hear, but we managed to find some Christian Rap that he likes...and Will Smith "Get Jiggy With It" is now a fave.

One of Alex's requests was "Hotel California" by the Eagles. Rod said he would have to listen to the words and make sure it was kid-friendly. It was a boarder-line decision since the word "hell" is mentioned, but we decided that if we talked to him about it, it would be okay. So one day while Alex is jamming out with his ear phones on he innocently exclaims, "Mom, I think there is a bad word in Hotel California. Can I tell you what it is?" I said, "Sure." He said, "Golitas...what does it mean?" I started laughing because I knew what word he was referring to..."The warm smell of colitas rising up through the air..." In actuality, I didn't know what the word meant but I told him I thought it was a type of flower.

Now my mission in life was to find out what the word "colitas" meant...or was that even the correct word in the song? After googling the lyrics to "Hotel California" and discovering that in fact, colitas was the correct word, trying to find out what it meant was another task. Google suggested that I mistyped and asked me if I meant colitis, which means an inflammation of the mucous membrane of the colon. Ooh! Surely, that can't be right! Don Henley can't be singing about the warm smell of an inflamed mucous membrane! After further investigation, I came across a website/chat room where people are pondering the lyrics to this song. Apparently, it has a lot of people stumped. Drum roll please....

[quote]It seems to translate as "little tips" or "buds" - presumably of the marijuana plant (Cannabis sativa) - where the tetrahydrocannabinol is most concentrated.[quote]

Okay, so I wasn't too far off the mark. I think for the sake of my 6 year old, we'll just stick with my version of a "type of flower." Marijuana plants do "flower", don't they? Ugh...now another mission...Google here I come!

Grandparents

Yesterday was my Aunt Sheri's birthday (my daddy's baby sister) and my Grandparents drove down from Cross Plains for a visit. As I was watching my Grandparents, who are in their mid-80's, interact with my children, it reminded me of my own childhood and how much I loved being with them. My memories are full of summers and holidays spent on their farm, picking fruit and vegetables from the garden, playing pool and records in the basement. No one can ever forget me banging on the piano and belting out my rendition of "Delta Dawn", "I Can't Live" or "Bette Davis' Eyes". My Aunt wasn't sure if she would live through this phase of my childhood, but 30 years later, we still laugh about it. Mumsy always baked me a chocolate cake (because hers was simply the best) and made me cinnamon toast and oatmeal for breakfast. I still crave her macaroni and cheese...something I've never been able to duplicate...and peach cobbler and apricot preserves. I loved going in to town and shopping at the local stores and picking out a little toy or treat. My memories of my time spent with them are so special because they made me feel special...something only Grandparents can do.

I am so blessed that my Grandparents have gotten to meet my boys and relive shared memories of my childhood with them. As Aidan was dancing around and singing "We Will Rock You" by Queen, Papa laughed and said, "Hey, did your mother teach you to do that?"...and I thought, no it's in his genes! Thank you, Mumsy and Papa, for passing on such good genes, memories and blessings to us all! I love you so much!

Tending the garden

I'm not a good gardener. In fact, I have a very black thumb. Whatever I plant tends to whither and die. Despite this, I keep trying because I love the outcome...if only temporary. I get excited to see the flowers blooming, the butterflies fluttering and the bumblebees pollinating. Nature doing what it does best, growing, thriving and producing. However, in the busyness of my life, I tend to neglect the very thing that I worked so hard to grow.

As I was pulling weeds today, it reminded me of a children's book that I read to my boys. In one part of the book, a little girl and her mom are tending their garden and pulling weeds. The mother uses the weeds as a metaphor to describe to her daughter how to nurture her spirit. Just like when we neglect our garden, the weeds choke and smother our plants, grass and flowers; the same is true for our spirit. When we allow negativity, anger, guilt, etc...to grow inside of us, it starts choking out the beauty and peace within. Surrendering our inner struggles to God and releasing the burdens of our life is like pulling weeds in our inner garden. Simplistic but true.

Although Aidan wasn't too thrilled with our task, it felt cathartic today tending to my garden. I was so thankful to God for loving me enough to cleanse my spirit, forgive my sins and listening/answering my prayers. Through God's Word, I am learning how to become the woman, wife, mother, daughter and friend He created me to be. I feel like a new flower bud blossoming and growing in His love.

Cleaning time well spent

So it's Friday and I'm trying to get my cleaning done before the weekend officially begins. The boys have been banished upstairs so I can sweep, mop and dust. In the midst of a very mundane task something miraculous happens...they ask if they can clean the upstairs! They asked me for cleaning supplies! These are words that a mother longs to hear but thinks she never will! They want to clean!!!

Alex got the Windex and some paper towels. I gave Andrew a damp rag and a feather duster. Aidan was there for moral support (actually, more like the supervisor since he likes to be the boss.) When I went to check on their progress, Andrew and Aidan were running with the paper towels draped around their shoulders like super heroes and swatting each other with wet rags. I know it's hopeful thinking, but maybe somehow their bodies were grabbing some dust bunnies along the way. Alex was faithfully cleaning the windows like a true pro with the Windex in one hand and the squeegee in the other. What can I say, the scene made me smile.

I quietly retreated downstairs and let it soak in. I poured myself a glass of red wine and held up my glass to cheer. I felt peaceful. Suddenly, Andrew was downstairs handing in his supplies. He was done. I told him how proud I was of him and how I thought he was going to make a really good husband some day. He looked at me, rolled his eyes and said, "Mommy, I can't clean all day, I have to go school!"

The filter-factor...

So I was once again explaining to my 6 year old tonight that there are sometimes when you should keep your mouth shut. For instance, when you have something to say that might hurt someone's feelings, you shouldn't say it out loud. He seems to think that every thought that comes to his head is okay to blurt out. This, of course, usually happens when we have guests over or are a guest in someone else's home. I'm sure the adults he councils on how to discipline their children really enjoy his advise; after all, he is so well versed on the subject of parenting. His precociousness is a bit much at times, and I'm left thinking, who's child is he? (Gulp...mine.)

Then it dawned on me: children aren't the only ones that lack the filter-factor. I know several adults (me included) that find it difficult to just shut up. How many times have you found yourself saying something you just wish you could take back? I will raise both of my hands to that statement. Of course, most of my embarrassing commentary comes from too many cocktails...need I say more?

My middle son, Andrew, who is 5, seems to have an innocent and funny way of blurting out his thoughts. Just the other day, Alex was telling Rod that he wanted him to be his t-ball coach forever. Andrew said, "Daddy, you can't be Alex's t-ball coach forever." Rod and I only thought we knew where this was going; we were wrong. "Why?" Rod asks. "Because you are getting too old!" Andrew says sweetly. Ouch!

My youngest child, Aidan, who is 2 1/2, is still at the stage where almost everything he does and says is cute. If I need a compliment, he's my man! One morning, after sleeping with him since 3 am, he wakes up, looks at me and says, "I love yo pretty hair!" He doesn't say "your" but "yo", which makes it even more endearing. (Of course, it was sticking up all over, but that is beside the point!) Most days, he tells me that he likes something I'm wearing or even that my freshly painted toenails are pretty. It's something I will miss dearly! However, don't get on his bad side. My in-laws call him the "General" because he's so bossy! If he doesn't like what you are doing, he will tell you that "yo" will be getting a spanking with the belt. In actuality, none of our children have ever had a spanking with a belt...but the General seems to think that this is just punishment for not giving him another piece of gum. I mean really, though, who can blame him?

Well, where do I begin? Blogging...ummm...what a concept. It led me to think, perhaps I should join the 21st century. The only problem is, my life isn't very exciting, but it is filled with children....and the occasional cast of characters that would make for a good/bad reality t.v. show. I might have to speak in code, though, to protect the innocent....:)

Today's adventure began with my dependable alarm clock, my oldest son, Alex. Every morning he wakes me up with a startling jolt of hyper-activeness that only a 6 year old can muster. He's my early bird. No matter what time he goes to bed, he's up between 6:30 - 7:00 am. Since I'm a night-owl, our mother/son conflict has already reared it's ugly face. Thank goodness he's cute or else I might just pull the covers over my head and moan...and believe me, some days I do.

He's already asking me questions that my still sleep-deprived brain can't quite comprehend..."Huh? What day is it? Where's my breakfast? Can I watch t.v.? Can I play a video game?" I quickly mumble "yes" to all of these questions and then "no"...both seem appropriate at the time. I keep my eyes tightly shut in hopes he's just a part of my dream.

"Mommy...wake up! I'm hungry!" He whines, shaking and poking me...and thus, the start of my day! Ahhh....but I'm thankful.